Today, I am taking a breath after the release of my long-awaited Regency spanking romance, Taming Lady Lydia. In the afterglow of Lydia, I want to resurrect a subject which I touched on once before back in 2015 (you can find my original post here – if you’d like to take a look,) and that is how to write the greatest sex.
Sex scenes can be a bind for some writers, but when you’re penning tales in erotic romance, getting the sex right is imperative. I am sure there are a great number of techniques when it comes to achieving this, and I’m looking for readers and other writers to jump in here and share, but here is my own personal take…
The best sex on the page is much like the best sex in real life – the first and most important thing to stimulate is the brain! I like to tease the brain a little whilst I prepare the optimum conditions for sex.
Firstly, I like to create conflict between the characters involved (whether that conflict is an abduction like Aurelie undergoes in The Viking’s Conquest, or a change in life circumstances, like the sort Lydia experiences in Taming Lady Lydia.) The characters need a struggle – reasons to resist each other – or in other words, the sex cannot be too easy.
Next up, they need anticipation, and they need a lot of it! Even if the conflict is resolved, the attraction between the characters has to be nurtured, and developed to a point where it is palpable on the written page. For me, the anticipation is key. It acts as the foreplay in my erotic romance, and prepares the reader for whatever debauchery I am planning to pen next!
Last, but definitely not least, is the elusive chemistry. The characters need chemistry, and this has to exist beyond the growing anticipation I am already building. There has to be something – that magic ingredient – which draws them to one another in spite of the conflict, and every other obstacle I am deliberately throwing in their path! This attraction is innate, and once I’ve spent time and circumstance building the anticipation, it will become tangible. The chemistry between Janie and Shaw in Submission at The Tower fits this bill, and two years on, I still have readers asking me to return to their story, and reprise their irresistible attraction.
My hope is that my readers will actually feel the connection between my characters, and that by the time their desire reaches fever pitch, the subsequent sex scenes will be breathless and mesmerising… That’s the plan anyway! 😉 It’s up to you – the reader – to let me know if I achieve my goal here, and I always welcome reader feedback.
So, why be shy? Readers, writers, what makes a scene erotic for you? What elements need to be in place for the perfect orgasmic showdown? Let me know, and check out my original post for more idea of what makes a sex scene sizzle!
Best wishes, Felicity x
A Regency Lady needs a firm hand, and she more than finds one in Lord Markham!
4 thoughts on “Writing sex right”
Great blog. I couldn’t agree more. Anticipation is what makes sex scenes simmer.
Another point I heard at a writers’ conference was ‘don’t use words in sex scenes that you can’t say out loud. Your hesitancy will be telegraphed to your readers.’
That’s a really interesting point, Libby! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. 🙂
Great post. Absolutely agree anticipation is key. I love the element of sensuality in a romance/sex scene instead of just a crudely written scene with no emotion.
I personally prefer stories with a build up of chemistry instead of just getting straight to it.
Thanks Violet – I agree totally – it’s all about chemistry and anticipation…
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